WEDDING DAY AND POST - WEDDING CUSTOMS

The Wedding Day

In contrast to the elaborate preparations, the wedding ceremony itself was simple. The bride and groom were conducted to the family altar, where they paid homage to Heaven and Earth, the family ancestors and the Kitchen God, Tsao-Chün. Tea, generally with two lotus seeds or two red dates in the cup, was offered to the groom’s parents.Then the bride and groom bowed to each other. This completed the marriage ceremony, except in some regions, where both also drank wine from the same goblet, ate sugar molded in the form of a rooster, and partook of the wedding dinner together.

The Nuptial Chamber

Immediately after the ceremony, the couple were led to the bridal chamber, where both sat on the bed. In some areas, honey and wine were poured into two goblets linked by a red thread. The bride and groom took a few sips and then exchanged cups and drank it down. On the day of the wedding (and sometimes for the next three days), the bed chamber was open to visitors, who were given to teasing the young couple with ribald remarks.

The Wedding Banquets

Generally, separate wedding feasts were given by the parents of the bride and the groom for their respective friends and families. Even at the feast, men and women sat separately. There could be a single feast for each or a series of feasts over several days. However, the most important feast was that given the groom’s family on the day of the wedding. It was generally considered as public recognition of the union.


On the morning after the wedding:

 The bride should awaken early to honor her new family. Traditionally, the bride would get up and dawn to offer sacrifices to her ancestors. This was also the time when she was formally introduced to her new family for the first time. Typically, modern Chinese newlyweds will visit the groom’s family home the morning after the wedding, where the bride will sometimes cook a meal for her new relatives.

Three days after the wedding:

The couple visits the bride’s family home. This is sometimes the bride’s last chance to spend time with her family, and historically, brides would oftentimes be moving far away to live with the groom’s family. Though these days travel is much more accessible, the third day visit is still an important ritual for new Chinese brides.

The Gift Exchange :

The Gift exchange is a very important part of the post-wedding activities. When visiting the groom’s family on day one, the bride will cook a meal or the couple might bring gifts for the family. In return, the groom’s extended relatives may offer some small tokens to the bride to welcome her into the family.

Visiting the Bride's family on day three :

When visiting the bride’s family on day three, the couple must bring a series of gifts and food. These traditionally include a roasted pig and many gifts for the family members. After this visit, the bride’s family sends return gifts to the groom’s family out of respect. These will consist of the head, tail, feet and half of the original roast pig, symbolizing a beginning and end. They should also send a bottle of liquor, a cake, fruit and vegetables, a green onion (the Chinese word sounds like ‘plentiful’) and a bamboo stick to symbolize rising step by step. They will also sometimes send a baby chicken in a lantern box.

MLA Citation

Local Traditional Chinese Wedding. Edited by Robert Lam Ping-fai. Hong Kong: Hong Kong Museum of History, 1986